My stand-up comedian mates tell me it’s critical to get your opener right. They say if you don’t get a strong laugh on your first joke, it’s going to be a long night. It’s the same with books. But instead of a traditional set-up followed by a hard joke, the comic author’s job is to simply get you in the mood. They’re setting the tone. They’re saying, “I hope you’re amused by this, because there are 100,000 words to go.” So without banging on too much more, here are my ten favourite funny first lines in literature.
Please note, I’m just going off what I’ve read, so if you have better ones, please leave them in the replies.
Professor David Goodstein's opening lines to "States of Matter" (1975) is pretty heavy:
Ludwig Boltzmann, who spent much of his life studying statistical mechanics, died in 1906, by his own hand. Paul Ehrenfest, carrying on the work, died similarly in 1933. Now it is our turn to study statistical mechanics. Perhaps it will be wise to approach the subject cautiously.
Bill Bryson 'somebody had to' is the one I remember. That line (and book) changed my life. Made me want to write a travel book. Made me want to be a writer.