C-WORDS AND SUPPOSITORIES: 20 TIMES WHEN POLITICIANS HAVE SAID THE DARNDEST THINGS
There are moments when politicians are actually trying to be funny and succeed like Abe Lincoln after he was accused of being two-faced: “If I had two faces, would I be wearing this one?” But this piece isn’t about those moments. It’s about gaffes and brain fades. Some recover from them. Others don’t. Personally, I don’t blame politicians for “misspeaking”. It’s hard not to say dumb shit when you’re doing stream-of-conscious ad lib for over a decade. But laughing at their embarrassing quotes is an important part of the democratic process. So here are 20 of them:
1: “You’re such a c—-.” - Christopher Pyne. In Pyne’s defense, he reckons he said “grub”. Go to the tape and decide for yourself.
2: “No one, however smart, however well-educated, however experienced … is the suppository of all wisdom”. – Australian PM, Tony Abbott.
3: "When your back's against the wall, it's time to turn around and start fighting." - British PM, John Major.
4: “They’re young, feisty, I think I can probably say have a bit of sex appeal and they’re just very connected with the local area.” - Australian PM, Tony Abbott comparing former Liberal MP Jackie Kelly with current Liberal candidate Fiona Scott.
5: “The poorest people either don’t have cars or actually don’t drive very far in many cases.” - Treasurer Joe Hockey, trying to reassure us that the proposed fuel tax increase would not hurt poorer Australians
6: “For seven and a half years I’ve worked alongside President Reagan. We’ve had triumphs. Made some mistakes. We’ve had some sex…uh…setbacks.” — President George Bush Sr.
7: “We’re going to have the best-educated American people in the world.” – Vice President Dan Quayle.
8: “It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment. It’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.” – Vice President Dan Quayle.
9: “It is wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago.” – Vice President Dan Quayle.
10: “I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix.” – Vice President Dan Quayle.
11: Harold Wilson is going around the country stirring up apathy.” – British Home Secretary, William Whitelaw.
12: “The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation’s history. I mean in this century’s history. But we all lived in this century. I didn’t live in this century.” – Vice President Dan Quayle.
13: “I am not worried about the deficit. It is big enough to take care of itself.”—President Ronald Reagan.
14: “Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stopthinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.” – President George W. Bush.
15: “Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?” – President George W. Bush.
16: “Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream.” – President George W. Bush.
17: “They misunderestimated me.” – President George W. Bush.
18 “Do you have blacks, too?” – President George W. Bush to Brazilian PresidentFernando Cardoso.
19: “Outside of the killings, DC has one of the lowest crime rates in the country.” – Mayor of Washington, D.C. Marion Barry.
20: “Life is indeed precious, and I believe the death penalty helps affirm this fact.” – New York City mayor Edward Koch.